© 2012 Sedef Örsel Özçelik

Nov 20, 2008

The Lover Role

Today's hectic life style requires us, the parents, to carry many roles with their countless different responsibilities attached: Parent, businessperson, friend, lover, son/daughter, sister/brother are the first ones that came to my mind.  
We switch from the parent role to businessperson role, then simultaneously to friend role, then to another role... and this switching between roles goes on and on...
SO what is the one role we play mostly?  
When our kids are young it's the parent role...  Our businessperson role requires at least 8 hours a day, 5 days a week... How about our role of being a "lover"?
Today I would like to remind you the importance of remembering our roles as lovers!  
Can you compare the difference in amount:  before having your first child and after having your first child!
"Playing, fulfilling and living" the lover role is as important to an adult as the parent role after having children!
When was the last REALLY romantic time/date you had?
Can you go out with your partner and have a romantic date at least once a week?
I know that many women's magazines mention this as a relationship saver or just something you need to do to make your partner happy (especially the father/husband/the man in your life)!!!
However, I would like to remind you the importance of playing the 'lover' role on your soul!  Regardless of gender, we all need intimacy!  And we need to spend some romantic time...  
IN BRIEF, to remind ourselves that we are not just parents...  but adults with many different roles who live life to its fullest extent!!!  
WHOLENESS includes all aspects of life!  Let's try to increase our time in the 'lover' role...  Here are some suggestions:
1 Have a set date night every week 
2 Start writing little love notes to your partner (send e-mail, phone messages, little post-it notes on the refrigerator, etc.)
3 Get some little surprise gifts for your partner (flowers, cards...)
4 Spend at least 15 minutes alone with your partner, giving 100% of your attention to him/her
5 Grooming yourself will help you to switch to the "lover" role effortlessly... (shave, have a manicure/pedicure, dress up, wear some perfume...)
6 Have fun...  sharing a laugh together will put you in the mood...


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